296. 1. Choosing whom to court is a prerogative of the man, and not of the woman. This is because the man was born to be a form of the intellect, whereas the woman was born to be a form of love. Moreover, it is inherent in men commonly to love the opposite sex in general, whereas it is inherent in women to love one of the opposite sex. And further, it is not unbecoming for men to speak of love and to declare it, while it is unbecoming for women to do so. Nevertheless, women still have the option of choosing one of a number of suitors.
As regards the first reason, that choosing whom to court is a prerogative of men because they were born to be forms of the intellect - the reason is that the intellect can discern congruities and incongruities and distinguish between them, and with judgment make a suitable choice. It is different in the case of women. Because they were born to be forms of love, they do not have the same clarity of sight, and decisions to marry would in their case be based only on inclinations of their love. Even if they have from men the knowledge to distinguish between men, their love is still swayed by appearances.
[2] As regards the second reason why choosing whom to court is a prerogative of men and not women - the reason is that it is inherent in men commonly to love the opposite sex in general and in women to love one of the opposite sex, and those who love the opposite sex in general are able to freely look about and also make a free decision. It is not the same for women, who have implanted in them to love one of the opposite sex. To confirm this, ask, if you like, the men among the people you meet about monogamous marriage and polygamous marriage, and you will seldom find any man who will not answer in favor of polygamous marriage, which also means a love for the opposite sex in general. On the other hand, ask women about these two kinds of marriage, and almost all, other than prostitutes, will reject polygamous marriages, which is why we say that it is in women to love one of the opposite sex, thus to feel conjugial love.
[3] As for the third reason, it is evident in itself that it is not unbecoming for men to speak of love and to declare it, while it is unbecoming for women to do so. It follows for this reason as well that it is for men to declare themselves, and if to declare themselves, so also to choose whom to court.
We say that women have the option of choosing one of a number of suitors, which is something everyone knows. But this kind of choice is a restricted and limited one, while that of men is broad and not limited.
