The marriage of good and truth can be thought of as the union between our desire for good and our understanding of how to be good. This relationship is not static but dynamic; good leads us to search for truth, and truths stand independently of our changes of state, so that we can measure ourselves against them and decide to apply them in our own lives as good. This process is the basis of human regeneration.

From childhood, we are all engaged in a struggle between our hearts and our minds, between the relatively selfish things we want and the more noble things we know are right. The more we do what we know is right, the more the Lord will slowly be able to start changing our hearts, removing the selfishness bit by bit so real love can come through. This is a lifelong process, but ultimately we can reach a state where we truly love doing what's right, and our hearts and minds can be "married" so that they can work as a united whole.

Everything in creation is a form of this marriage. In human society, it can be found in many ways. It can exist inside each person individually. It can exist between a husband and a wife, since women have gifts for receiving the desire for good and men have gifts for receiving the understanding of truth. It can be forged by a group of people as a church. And it exists between the Lord as the bridegroom and the church as a bride.

When the Bible talks about marriage, marrying, and weddings, it is also talking on a deeper level about the spiritual marriage of good and truth.

(References: Arcana Coelestia 2466; Conjugial Love 44 [6])

45. THE STATE OF MARRIED PARTNERS AFTER DEATH

We have just shown in the preceding chapter that marriages exist in heaven. In this chapter we will now show whether or not a marriage covenant contracted in the world will continue and remain in force after death.

It is necessary that I make this known, because it is not a matter of judgment but of personal experience, and I have had this experience through association with angels and spirits. Nevertheless, I must make it known in such a way that reason may also assent.

Among the prayers and yearnings of married partners, moreover, is a wish to know the state of married partners after death. For men who have loved their wives wish to know - if their wives have died - whether it is well with them. So, too, wives who have loved their husbands. And they want to know whether they will meet again.

Many married couples also would like to know in advance whether partners separate after death or whether they stay together. Those who are discordant in spirit wish to know whether partners separate. And those who are concordant in spirit wish to know whether they stay together.

Because these are some of the things people would like answers to, they will be made known, and this will be done in the following order:

1. In every person after death, love for the opposite sex continues to be what it was like inwardly, that is, what it was like in the person's inner will and thought in the world.

2. Likewise conjugial love.

3. Most married couples meet after death, recognize each other, associate again, and live together for a time, which occurs in their first state, thus while they are still maintaining the outward aspects of their lives as they did in the world.

4. Progressively, however, as married partners put off outward appearances and enter into their inward qualities, they gradually perceive what sort of love and mutual feeling they had had for each other, and consequently whether it is possible for them to live together or not.

5. If it is possible for married partners to live together, they remain partners. But if it is not possible, they separate, the husband sometimes separating from the wife, the wife sometimes from the husband, and both of them sometimes from each other.

6. A man is then given a suitable wife, and a woman, likewise, a suitable husband.

7. Married couples enjoy the same intimate relations with each other as in the world, only more delightful and blessed, but without begetting children. Instead of or to take the place of begetting children, they experience a spiritual procreation, which is one of love and wisdom.

8. This is what happens in the case of people who come into heaven. It is different, however, with those who go to hell.

Development of this outline now follows, elucidating and supporting the various statements: